Title sounds seriously, isn’t it?
Well, disease, which I’m writing about is worst than every illness, complaint and disorder, connected together. It’s a creator of every suffering and pain in the world, that killed many people, but also ideas, dreams and relationships.
It works like the most poisonous reptile venom, by paralyzing, and later leads to a slow and painful death. It’s also used to control and influence us to do what others want.
Perhaps, is present in you even now, because, by reading words above, you can feel…
…fear.
FEAR – Falsehood Extremely Affects Reactions
Fear kills:
People
– overwhelmed by problems, people decide to end their lives, by commiting suicide
– guided by greed (of money, power, control, sex), revenge and hatred (these negative emotions are feeded and formed by fear) people become murderers
Dreams, Ambitions, Goals
– fear of failure kills many brilliant inventions and ideas
– we’re afraid to take risk, because we can lose money, sometimes, also friends (in that case, what kind of friends are they?), and it also connected with doing hard work, and changing our life and habits
– jealous people destroy those who can achieve more than they
Relationships (love, friendship)
– we are afraid to being honest, tell our partner what bothering us, instead, we hope that he guess everything
– we’re afraid to talk to strangers, killing love and maybe beautiful relationships, before even starting them
– we are afraid to speak to strangers, because we’re worrying about their opinions (instead of believing in others and ourselves, we believe in restrictive rules and conventions)
Humanity
– when someone needs help, we’re more afraid about ourselves, giving permission for hurting someone else
– we’re indifferent, passive and cowardly, we care about nothing except us
FEAR -Forget Everything About Real…
…life.
We are afraid of everything:
– lose our (very often heavy and unprofitable) job, because we will don’t have money to live
– break up with partner (who is despicable, insincere and dishonest) because we don’ want to be alone
– some of us, are afraid to meet new people by using traditional methods (we prefer internet – Facebook, dating sites, instant messaging, forums, etc.)
– we are afraid to oppose evil (because someone can hurt us)
– we are afraid to speak (maybe by misunderstood of the sentence „silence is golden”)
– we are afraid to be afraid because stress is not a pleasant feeling
– we are afraid of death
– we are even afraid of…life after death
We live „carefully and reasonable”, which is only a substitute of life, and this looks like death before end of the life.
FEAR – Faith Experiencing A Restriction
We afraid of „life after life”, thinking that God, send us to hell.
It’s not true. Hell is used to scaring us.
Parents often talks to their children, „Do not steal, because you will go to hell”, „do not curse, because you will go to hell”.
And also „God will punish you”, „Be afraid of the God” etc.
Why do you think that God, who is Love, send people to hell, when some of us, often have hell on earth? And how can you love someone who you are afraid?
God is Love, Love is opposite of Fear.
Neale Donald Walsh written, in the book „Conversations with God”:
There is no such thing as the devil, and hell does not exist. You are saving yourself from the oblivion of non-realization.
Also, in the same book, Walsh gives „the definition” of hell:
It is the experience of the worst possible outcome of your choices, decisions, and creations. It is the natural consequence of any thought which denies Me, or says no to Who You Are in relationship to Me.
It is the pain you suffer through wrong thinking. Yet even the term wrong thinking is a misnomer, because there is no such thing as that which is wrong.
Hell is the opposite of joy. It is unfulfillment. It is knowing Who and What You Are, and failing to experience that. It is being less. That is hell, and there is none greater for your soul.
„Hell” is about thinking negative, pessimistic, without faith and hope.
When you’re doubting in yourself, complaining to others and circumstances, cultivate grief and sorrow shifting responsibility to other people or circumstances, living below your potential, allowing the fears, prejudices, opinions from others, win with your inner voice – intuition and heart .
In the same book, we can read:
Hell does not exist as this place you have fantasized, where you burn in some everlasting fire, or exist in some state of everlasting torment. What purpose could I have in that?
Even if I did hold the extraordinarily unGodly thought that you did not deserve to heaven, why would I have a need to seek some kind of revenge, or punishment, for your failing? Wouldn’t it be a simple matter for Me to just dispose of you? What vengeful part of Me would require that I subject you to eternal suffering of a type and at a level beyond description?
If you answer, the need for justice, would not a simple denial of communion with Me in heaven serve the ends of justice? Is the unending infliction of pain also required?
I tell you there is no such experience after death as you have constructed in your fear-based theologies. Yet there is an experience of the soul so unhappy, so incomplete, so less than whole, so separated from God’s greatest joy, that to your soul this would be hell. But I tell you I do not send you there, nor do I cause this experience to be visited upon you. You, yourself, create the experience, whenever and however you separate your Self from your own highest thought about you. You, yourself, create the experience, whenever you deny your Self; whenever you reject Who and What You Really Are.
Yet even this experience is never eternal. It cannot be, for it is not My plan that you shall be separated from Me forever and ever. Indeed, such a thing is an impossibility – for to achieve such an event, not only would you have to deny Who You Are – I would have to as well. This I will never do. And so long as one of us holds the truth about you, the truth about you shall ultimately prevail.
FEAR – False Evidence Appearing Real
Fear is also a tool to cause mental pain, suffering, coming from feeling guilt. Focusing on what will happens next, how we affect it and whether everything ends well. It’s a very powerful weapon, used by a lot of manipulators.
Fear causes grief, sorrow, remorse. By connecting to our psyche, which (especially when dealing with sensitive, vulnerable and kind people), we’re answering to that phone call, instead of cancel the connection.
This connection, initiated a dialogue with our thoughts, looking for faults in everything, most often in ourselves. It creates a psychical pain, that destroy us from inside.
Conversations with negative thoughts, imagining the worst possible scenario, takes a lot of time and is expensive. Our psyche pay the bills.
Bad mood induces passivity, we can not focus on anything else but the problem plaguing us (it’s like to be paralyzed).
The person who caused it, know how we feel and use it against us, to do something wrong, contrary to us. This leads to an even worse mood and remorse in us.
FEAR – Facing Enemy And Retreating
As a person who has a history of schizophrenia, I can assure you that mental illness, will dissappear, if fear would not exist . Delusions, voices come from misinterpretations of what we see around. Fear connected with extensive imagination, can be disastrous, not only for us.
Fear pushes everything toward mental pain and suffering that evoke remorse, grief, sadness. We’re afraid of our life or/and also someone else life and safety.
I learned that the cure for schizophrenia should not be only drugs such as neuroleptics (or not at all, but because of my insignificant medical knowledge, about their effectiveness, I must abstain from hasty conclusions) but intense social training, developing courage, exposure to stress and fear, instead of avoiding it.
We should try to stop monologues inside us and take action (work, passion, helps very much with that).
Do what you fear and fear disappears – David Joseph Schwartz
It is a hard road, changing the habits of thinking, using courage, living in constant fear, stress, and opposing him by taking risk in life, being brave and optimist. Especially on beginning.
But the relief that you feel when you realize that you are not alone, God is with you, and all concerns, fears, worries are unnecessary and useless, is indescribable positive.
Before I realize this, I was a slave. Slave of fear.
Fear is still present in my life, but is no longer my enemy. It’s like a green light, that tells what I have to do. I know that I will not avoid fear in life, as well as stress, but I take a big effort, by not allowing decision-making by fear and stress, instead of me.
Greg Plitt said:
Behind every fear is a person you want to be. Fear is self-imposed, meaning it doesn’t exist. You create it. You can destroy it too. You face your fears and become the person you want to be. You run from your fears, you’re not living. You are alive but you not dig in the freedom. You are not running the day, the day is running you – Greg Plitt
People manipulating others by fear, often like our authorities, whom opinion we care. Superiors, partners, parents, teachers – we take what they said very seriously. We afraid that they can threaten us bad, fire us, even beat us, throw away from the university, end the relationship and a lot of other things.
This type of manipulation and intimidation happen very often in different places. Home, work, school etc.
People are destroying people, mostly in order to obtain various types of material goods and their sick ambitions to rule others.
How can we oppose from that?
People rarely opposing to that.
We’re afraid that family can stop support and loving us, boss will not pay the salary or/and lay-off us from job, girlfriend/boyfriend can break up, someone can beat us etc. etc. etc
The avalanche of troubles begins with the permission of treatment yourself as someone worse.
If you allow to intimidate, manipulate yourself, your problems, will not dissapear, but get deeper, because such people never have enough and always take advantage of your weakness, as soon as you let them.
One of the known principles (though rarely practiced) says, „do what you are afraid” – be brave, and say „no” when someone trying to exploit your weaknesses.
Can you lose your job? Yes.
Can someone beat you or even worse? Yes.
Does saying „yes” when the inside would like to say „no”, will help you to avoid problems -of course no. It does not guarantee you that manipulator don’t meet the threats.
The more often you will accept the treatment yourself as someone worse, who is afraid to oppose by people, formally, being situated higher professionally and socially, the more you will be immersed in the swamp of your own fear. In the end, you will drown.
FEAR – Fundamental Expectations Alters Reality
The main weapon of people who want to take advantage of you, deceive, manipulate is referring to the most important human needs and use those needs against you.
We strive to love (from our partner and family), we want to keep up financially so that we could afford to satisfy hunger, thirst. We want to have good, well payed jobs, social connections and relations. We are looking for acceptance, liking to impress others.
Fear applies to egocentrism. As egocentrics, we focus all the attention on ourselves, without worry about the others. We think that most important are our needs, even if we harm other people. We’re concern the most of our own security.
The fear of physical and mental pain, losing money, work, family it’s below everything. Rarely anyone uses here compromises, even more rarely, someone chooses the suffering of their own, rather than opportunities to help someone by opposing evil. It is easier (at first glance), requires less effort, but after a time, remorse, can be unbearable.
The temptation to obtain, acquire better jobs associated with bigger payment is often used by people who want in this sordid way to achieve something. Only few can resist higher wages, many thinks that money is the goal, not a resource.
Think about your work, place where people want to take advantage of you, instead of appreciate. How do you get to be productive, knowing all of this, or at least suspect? How do you live when you think everyday about that, meet with people who want to harm you?
You need to get rid of the fear, get rid of them.
FEAR – Fearless Explorer Accepts Rationality
Thinking what to do, analyzing is pointless. You know what tells you heart and intuition, but often you pretend to be deaf, even if it screams in your ear and tugging your arm.
It’s like having a young children. You must react when he’s screaming, because you love him, he’s a part of you. You can’t pretend that you’re blind, deaf and feel nothing, when he pulls you by the arm.
You can live according to your personality, opposing the omnipresent evil guided to you and other people. Yes, this is possible, but you must choose courage instead of fear.
God will always be with you regardless of the your decisions, and circumstances.
If God is with you, who can be against you?
The power, needed to oppose evil and realize your goals, often connected with, seems like naive and idealistic principles, is faith, connected with a sense of purpose and courage. What all these have in common?
That what God is, what makes that feel when you see the person you love, when you feel warmth in your heart. The highest feeling of all feelings, most needed and beautiful, which everyone seeks, and everyone is looking for. You have that, from birth, in the form of spiritual, as God – Love.
Love is a courage, courage is „powered” by faith.
Faith in you, your abilities, positive future and of course, in God.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to force you to do anything, but only to encourage. Faith is your choice. Of course, you can be brave without faith in God.
By choosing courage, instead of fear, you are growing up mentally and spiritually. You are stronger and stronger, everytime you choose courage.
It may seem difficult, hard, especially when you are in such situation for the first time, but:
Courage is like a muscle – it is streghtened by use – Ruth Gordon
If you have family, by choosing fear, you give them, a very bad example of what we should do on situations like this. In this way, how you want to help them?
By showing weakness, acceptance on someone’s sick expectations, makes that your problem is growing and create others complications and problems.
In work, paying tribute, giving bribes, promotion by the bed of superior who threatened you a dismissal or intimidated in a different way, makes that you feel like a dirt.
This will also not give any guarantee that the threat will not be met.
Superior will increasingly use your weaknessess, forcing more and more bad things, leading to the fact that you’ll want to commit suicide, knowing how many bad things you’ve done, to yourself and others.
You will think that you’re a weak coward.
It’s not true, but that, what you think about yourself, it’s your choice.
If you choose courage,, be sure, that you will feel better and stronger.
FEAR – Fingering Everyones Abandon Responsibility
You can’t escape from your own mind and fear in it, by leaving your head on the ground and going in other way, but If you take heart with you, It will give you confidence, courage and sense of meaning.
Blaming others will not work.
You know that you made a decision. Every time, when you choose fear, something in you died.
We are hearing and reading about many, such tragedies.
It happens, you never know who you will meet in your life, moral decline and treatment others like things, exploitation them, is very common.
When you oppose for that, yes, someone also can meet the threat, but the final winner is you.
You will feel it, you will feel a huge relief and peace of mind when you make a brave decision.
Instead of feeling like crap, you will realize that you are an independent person, not subordinating to the others and which others can’t take advantage of, exploit.
This will not only temporary relief, it affects into your whole life and personality, increasing self-confidence. Surely you know that self-confidence is very useful in life.
When searching for work, self confidence makes, that you are more picky in choosing job. The roles will be reversed.
You will not have to beg anyone for employment, and the employer (kind and fair – they still exist) seeing your independence (associated with characteristics of the leaders, who, usually, don’t have a problems with finding a occupation) with bigger pleasure, give you a job.
You can inspire others, so there will be more brave people like you, and in a consequence of that, places which are similar to concentration camps, after some time, dissapear.
No one will want to work in such companies, so bosses, directors, managers, will have to change the approach to employees, or go bankrupt.
Exploiting, manipulating and intimadating junior staff, its not only fault of people who are higher up in the hierarchy of workers, but also those employees who agree to such treatment themselves by their bosses and co-workers.
It sounds cruel? Taking full responsibility for your life, in practice, it is not cruel, but it is very hard way, and also, appropriate and very satisfying.
You can make enemies, but only someone who is nobody, don’t have them.
When you want to resist, but at the same time think about safety of your family, worry about them, by choosing fear you shows weak side of your personality. In this way, you will help nobody.
Your children may think that this is the right course of action, follow the line of least resistance. This affect into their life, making them mentally weak and it is possible that sooner or later, someone will destroy them.
Your behavior will not only be a bad example, but a prophetic, real nightmare for them. Seeing that your parent, choose fear, and falls to his knees in a confrontation with another man is very demotivating. That leaves a mark on your kids life and, in accordance with the so-called. „domino effect”, children of your children may behave the same way.
I know, that sounds tragical and pessimistic, but one, bad move, one decision dictaded by fear, can ruin many things and…lives.
Decision, choice is yours, but every kind of analysis, meditation ends always with one conclusion – you need to act. Action is associated with courage, try do not let fear make a decision.
Next, very important thing connected with above, is that you have to think possitive regardless of the taken decisions and their consequences.
You can’t always win, is not possible, but you can be prepared to worst scenarios. Not by being still worried and afraid, but by thinking positive.
It’s very helpful, in every kind of situation, not even in those less important, but especially in worst of them.
Keep the faith.
FEAR – Faked Evidence About Rapture
In partnerships, behavior connected with manipulation and threat, is very similar. „I’ll brake with you,” , „I’ll give you divorce and take children” and other sentences having to induce fear and manipulate you, to do what the other person wants. If the partner threatens you like that, trying to induce remorse, I suggest you to reflect seriously the meaning of being with such a person.
You should know and feel that partner not loving you sincerely, selflessly and without (often sick) expectation. Life with that person, will be a nightmare (every day getting worse) , not a partnership in the full sense of the word.
Once again – love.
In a relationship, where people loves each other, there is no place for such behavior, featured with opposite of love – fear. Partner maintaining in this way, maybe loves you, but is afraid to lose you, wanting to control, rule your person or simply, use you.
If you know that, and want to end a relationship, you have to be honest with partner and yourself. Make a clear, impassable borders, specify, describe how you feel and what you want to change.
You should do that, even if you are afraid, especially, when you are afraid.
We all want to be loved, but sometimes, you can feel and recognize, that someone is not accepting you totally, and want, expect more from you than…you.
Never chase love, affection, or attention. If it isn’t given freely by another person, it isn’t worth having. – Unknown
Only one person should expect changes in you and only one person can make and allow you to feel like a someone worse than others – You.
FEAR – Friend Ended A Reading
Is on earth something we are not afraid?
No. Even if something looks, at the beginning, pleasant and nice, fear can destroy it.
When you, last time, was afraid of something that now is not important?
And now, when you know that previous fear was unnecessary and unwanted, now you afraid of something else?
Of course, you know inside, that later it happens again, and again, and again but you still are afraid.
Why?
Maybe you think that fear can prepare us for something bad?
If yes, you should know, that preparing for something bad by being afraid of it, it’s like going to dance club where dance floor is on fire.
Even if you dance like Michael Jackson or Fred Astaire, this will be painfull and non effective.
But, if you’re not afraid, you don’t need even to know, how to dance.
You can enjoy music and do not move according to the rhythm.
Because, it is fun.
When you will be enjoying this, instead of worrying, nothing and nobody will be able to threaten you. Even if someone is better dancer than you.
Sound’s crazy, isn’t it?
Life should be fun and enjoyable, no matter what you do, where and who you are.
But you can always stay reasonable and unoriginal, being afraid of almost everything, so everything becomes a nightmare, especially your life. It’s like funeral march played in a dance club…club for zombies…
You have a choice.
Oh, you’re afraid to make a decision?
It’s also a decision, in addition, the worst possible.
And you know why.
Take care,
Janusz
@ – januszkoch@hotmail.com